Life After Sixty Something

I recently attended a Retirement Seminar where the guest speaker encouraged her audience to “Don’t Retire, Refire”, emphasizing the point that just because you hit your retirement years, is no reason to think it’s all over. Then a few weeks later, I was attending a workshop on building a successful business, and they were a couple of retirees or near sixty somethings, who were wanting to “refire”, but were in danger of misfiring. They were on the right track in terms of recognizing that retirement did not mean the end of the road in terms of their productivity and earning capacity. At the same time they were admittedly hopelessly confused about what they should be doing to refire and turn their skills and expertise into a post-retirement source of income. During the course of the day’s sessions, the Facilitator was able to show them how an interest, hobby or talent – many of which they mentioned casually in passing – could with the right tools, be converted into a stream of income. They were surprised to discover it wasn’t rocket science after all.

A lot of us make that mistake though. We are good at what we do in our careers, professions and every day jobs, and good at a lot of other things on the side also, but we have never really given any thought as to how we can harness those very same skills and talents and channel them into other activities when we are no longer sitting at a desk in our structured 9 to 5 environment. Think about it, how many retired loved ones, friends, former colleagues or associates have you seen struggling in their senior years to make their pension and life savings stretch to meet their daily needs and expenses. Their minds are still active, alert and sharp, and many of them are still physically agile too, but because they no longer work at “the office”, they fall into the trap of thinking that retirement is their new job, and that their income-earning days are over.

But what about those people who used to plan and successfully convene scores of meetings, conferences and events for their organizations from start to finish – have you ever thought that with the right networking, you could turn that skill into an event-planning career in your post-retirement years? Same is true for those Moms who were active in their kids’ school fund-raising events, organizing the fish fry and the barbecue night, persuading sponsors to contribute to a worthy cause, or you women who have helped plan countless weddings for your daughters, Goddaughters and your dear cousin Shirley, the repeat serial bride….Hmmm…..methinks there might be some post-retirement cheese down that hole……

So you make a mean lasagna and people always used to rave about the speciality dishes you offered up for staff parties and the annual staff talent show. Is there a small home-based catering business in the post-retirement crystal ball for you? Or was speech/document writing and editing a part of your daily diet at the office? Well maybe there’s a book inside of you just waiting to be written. And before you start mumbling about the difficulties of manuscripts and publishers and all of that, here’s a treasure I discovered during the Workshop – just about anybody can publish an e-book with Amazon or the various other web-based platforms, and it costs you nothing except your time.

The point is, whatever your expertise, skill, talent or hobby; whatever experience you gained sitting on the PTA or the Board of a Not-for-Profit organization, it doesn’t dry up the day you collect that last pay cheque, or step down from the committee. Many of these gifts can be channeled into a business opportunity which you can even operate from the comfort of your home without incurring any significant overhead costs. In some cases, you might what to do a little extra training to perfect a hobby and convert it into a marketable and income-generating skill. Like one friend I know loves baking desserts as a hobby, so she went off and did a short course on cake decorating to enhance her skill and turn it into a sideline business which will become a useful source of income when she retires. And of course the same is true for your senior loved ones – as long as they are still physically and mentally able, there’s nothing wrong with them doing a short course to enhance an existing skill or even learn a new one which they can put to good productive and profitable use. Why, my own father was learning to use the computer at 80!

And here’s the other little treasure that I picked up at the successful business workshop. There’s a wonderful website called fiverr.com where you can market your skills (and I mean just about any skill!) for US$5. Now what’s a measly $5 you might think, but as we say in my culture “every mickle mek a muckle”, or translated – every little bit adds up! You might be surprised how quickly $5 becomes $500 when you have time, and you do have time…..

So why not start thinking today about how you can harness your experience, your talents and your passions into an activity that can allow you to continue to make a contribution to society in your post-retirement years, and very importantly to your own financial needs!

Some Elder Care Resolutions

If you have seniors in your life, particularly those who are mentally or physically challenged, you know how difficult it can be to manage their special needs. As the younger person in the relationship you have respect and reverence for them, but at the same time you may be called upon to become a caregiver, taking care of their most personal and intimate needs if their minds and bodies have started to fail. Unfortunately nothing prepares us for the delicate act and it isn’t surprising that many of us don’t handle the change of role very well. As we start a new year, here are some resolutions that may help you to manage this aspect of your life.

Resolve to:

• Meet the person at the point of their needs – not yours. When you love and care for an older person you sometimes try to micromanage their every move but by doing so you may rob the person of their dignity and independence. I know of many situations in which well meaning relatives in the city insist on moving a parent or grandparent from their rural area because they want to care for them. Unfortunately the senior does not function very well in the new environment and is unhappy. While the motives are good, perhaps a different strategy could have been used to take care of the senior’s needs. It may require more work and creativity but it may be worthwhile to preserve the senior’s independence, dignity and happiness for as long as possible.

• Talk about the difficult issues. As our parents and grandparents age, there are many issues that we need to discuss with them. For example we may need to know the state and location of their finances in case of an emergency, their end of life wishes and any specific preferences for the disposal and care of their estate. Many of us shy away from discussing these issues because we don’t know how or we don’t want to interfere. However, we may live to regret our delay if a relative lapses into a coma and the doctors ask us to make a decision about their care, or if they need emergency health care and we don’t know where or how to access the funds required for their care. Talking about the difficult decisions just makes sense and it can be less painful if you have prepared fully for it. For some guidelines on handling these awkward conversations, refer to some of the previous blogs on this site.

• Get the help that you need. I wrote this blog primarily for Caribbean people because I recognize that while we are living longer, we don’t yet have all of the facilities in place to deal with our aging population. There are resources however and they are increasing in number so you don’t have to try to manage elderly care on your own. It can take a village to care for a senior citizen, so connect with your the appropriate senior citizens associations, church outreach groups and governmental agencies to find out what assistance and support they can offer. Reach out to friends and family who can assist. In caring for the senior, be specific in what you ask for and be persistent in asking for help, particularly in the case of other family members. In the case of government entities, get the facts and be prepared to negotiate the red tape which may be well worth your while if you can get the financial assistance that is needed.

• Become more informed about senior care. Almost every expectant mother I have known has read the book’What to expect when you are Expecting’ .– It’s an expert guide on a phase of life which offers expectant mothers some knowledge – and as we know knowledge is power. Parents read books on how to raise their children, but how many people read and learn about managing the care of the elderly? There are many resources out there in bookstores, on the web and at various senior citizens organizations. Don’t try to drive blindfolded! Learn from those who have gone before and adopt and adapt what is relevant for your particular situation. And, of course read this blog regularly!

• Put the oxygen mask on yourself first. If you travel, you know that the safety instructions on every airline advise you to take this seemingly counter-intuitive advice. The reasoning is simple – you need to put yourself in the position of being able to help those who are dependent on you, so you must help yourself first. Dealing with the elderly can be physically and emotionally exhausting and burnout is quite common among caregivers, often rendering them incapable of caring for themselves or others. While it may be difficult to find the time to do anything for yourself, you have to prioritize this. Taking a few hours away from caring for a parent with Alzheimers puts you in a much better position to care for them than if you are overwhelmed because you feel that you can never get away. Don’t let guilt or fear prevent you from asking for the help that you need and deserve.

These are my suggested resolutions but add your own and please stick to them! Happy New Year!